I’ll never forget our friends inviting this so-called “Important Christian Couple” to a church where I was speaking. They rocked up, but as soon as it was over … poof … they were gone. Once we met up with our friends after the service, I asked them where the VIP Christian Dynamic Duo went. They said they left, and the wife didn’t like me because, and I quote, “I wasn’t her style of preacher. I was too matter-of-fact.” Yep, she didn’t like the cut of my jib. What she didn’t say was, “He preached heresy” or “He was boring” because those are two things I try to avoid more than Donald Trump does a wet Rosie O’Donnell French kiss.

Dear Preacher Police: If you have a style, or a manner, or a prerequisite, or a cup of tea, or any type of imperative that must be met before you’ll receive instruction or rebuke from a minister then I guarantee God is going to purposefully, if you are His kid, insult you in a surly way, to wake your unbiblical backside up.

The Pharisees and the Sadducees and their wannabe lackeys had a “style”. They had religious bells and smells. Veritable, incense and nonsense aplenty. They had certain ways and means of preaching and teaching. They had rules for what one could and could not do in the Temple, especially on the Sabbath. Good Lawd! They had many, many boxes to check. As a matter of fact, they worshiped their customs more than they worshiped God. It’s true. Google it.

I’ve been a Christian now at this writing for thirty-nine years. I’ve seen and heard all kinds of preaching delivered in all kinds of ways. I’ve heard sonorous, white, Lutheran preachers preach. I’ve heard screaming and funny black pastors. I’ve been on the receiving end of fiery Hispanic hell-fire messages. I’ve been regaled by hilarious and holy raconteurs of various stripes, colors, and denominations from all over America, Western and Southern Europe, and Africa, and guess what, dear reader? I don’t have a favorite “style” that I prefer. I dig ‘em all. Vive la différence! The only thing I give a flibbertigibbet about, when it comes to preaching, is – Was it sound doctrine? That’s it, folks. That's all I care about. I do not care whether said minister dotted my punctilious religious “i’s” or crossed all of my persnickety stylistic “t’s”.

Here’s something they never told you in Youth Group: If you have a style of religion you worship, more than you worship God, then God, via the Holy Spirit, is going to send someone your way, with a message you won’t like, through a person you won’t dig, to upset your vainglorious applecart. Yep, someone will hit you with a truth bomb, which you will deem scurrilous and below your tedious sensibilities.

Check it out: God sent the most tidy group of tightly wound religious wonks, the most irreligious and insulting prophet on the planet, namely … John the Baptist.

Here’s something terrifying to chew on: Heaven and hell hung in the balance for the Pharisees and Sadducees, and it was based on their response to wild John and his savage message. Would they choose to overlook his unpolished appearance and embrace his prickly preaching or blow him off because of his style, or lack thereof? Again, think about it: God purposely put this boorish prophet with his curt communique in front of well-heeled and priggish experts to see if they’d repent of their self-righteousness or harden their hearts because John came off like an impolite caveman.

Some folks took offense at John’s person and message and were eternally damned. Others did not get offended at John’s gruff directives and were privileged with an entrance into God’s eternal Kingdom. Yep, John’s person and words, to the puffed-up wizards, were a raw and offensive eternal stench of death. To those broken by John’s cannonball message to repent, they perceived that earful as a vital fragrance, life-giving and fresh (2Cor. 2:16). So strange, eh? One group’s fate was doomed to a hellish abyss, and one group was consigned to an abundant, eternal life, and they all heard the same dispatch from the unpolished prophet.

When I was at college, I had two professors who were very John the Baptist-like in their approach to schooling us young fools. One was my PoliSci prof and the other my Life Drawing instructor. The Political Science professor was from Lagos, Nigeria. He fled that craphole for the States ten years prior to his teaching gig. He wanted to live in a country that had a legit Constitution that provided liberty and the pursuit of happiness for its citizens. He took our Constitution, the Bill of Rights, and our Declaration of Independence oh, so, seriously. If you were an American, slack-jawed, gum-smacking young moron who didn’t know our Founding Documents and their original intent, then you were in deep yogurt around him. My professor would call you out. He’d scream at people for being ignorant of the roots of our Great Experiment in Self-Governance. And I mean, SCREAM. Coeds ran crying from his class. They’d quit in droves. I came to love his uncouth approach when I finally figured out what he was doing. He was thinning the herd. He wanted to raise the next generation of leaders and not babysit hungover, narcissistic, sorority and fraternity dolts.

My life drawing teacher was also similarly wired. He’d weed out the graphic design boys and girls from the Fine Arts’ grad track. If you didn’t have serious raw artistic talent, it was his goal and chief joy to get you the heck out of his class. I’ll never forget we were in a three-hour life drawing session, and at the end of the class, the students had to show off their final renderings of the nude model. He told this one wannabe that if what he depicted were to come off his easel and walk around this room, everyone would flee in terror. He had several guys and dolls in tears. He would probably be canceled in today’s fragile atmosphere of overt wussification. Yes, Dinky: he was rougher than grandma’s breath. I believe he shamed two-thirds of our class that year into quitting within the first couple of weeks. It was awesome watching him separate the sheep from the goats. If you didn’t have the chops, or if you did have the skills, or were not serious about classical renderings of the human body, then he made it his job to be your worst nightmare. However, if you had rudimentary talents and pursued excellence, then you had his full attention and expertise at your disposal.

In our soft-focus world of over-niceties, we don’t see my former professors’ brusque behavior as beneficial, but rather bellicose and bad. In addition, we can’t or won’t imagine our seven-pound, thirteen-ounce baby Jesus ever being so crude, rude, and socially unacceptable. But both Jesus and John the Baptist were. They had The Gift of Plain Speaking down pat.

Yep, back in the day, if you were a smug holier-than-thou dweeb, or a rich young ruler, or an oily politician, or some strutting Rico Suave, or a vacillating vixen and you collided with John the Baptist or Jesus; it wasn't going to end well for your flesh and they’d probably come off as “rude” to your exceedingly self-important, impenitent sensibilities.

There’s no getting around all the rude/“negative” aspects of the scripture, where God directly, or indirectly, through His prophets or through other providential means, jackhammers His kids when they’re being jackasses. If you removed all the rude and raw scriptures from the Bible, you’d have a three-page leafy pamphlet.

So, exactly what is a “Rude Awakening?” Well, I’m glad you asked, you inquiring mind. Simply put, a rude awakening is a sudden realization of the true/bad state of affairs, having previously been under the illusion that everything was hunky-dory.

For instance, the Pharisees thought they were fine, but they were not. They were headed to hell. Their dad was the Devil. They were completely delusional, spiritually deceived, rotted to the core, but externally … They were “very religious and good conservatives.” Here’s a FYI: did you know a person can be very religious and vote for the GOP and not be right with God? Anyway … I digress. John’s soaking the Pharisees down with the firehose of acidic truths was a last-ditch effort to get these haughty legalists' souls plucked from the pending pit.

Ditto with the Sadducees.

The general populace, upon hearing JB’s rebukes to the uber-religious and his general call to repentance were also stunned into realizing they must repent or be damned. John’s message hit home: they were out of sorts with God, and they came in droves asking John, “What do we do?” (Lk. 7:10) John’s message made them realize they were jacked up. John didn’t tell them, “God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life.” John was more like, “Dude, you’re in deep doo-doo. Everything you know, and everything that you’re doing, is wrong. God’s wrath is against that mess, and I highly suggest you do a 180, PDQ” (Author’s paraphrase).

The Tax Collectors, who were regarded as the scum of the earth in Israel, were also shocked into repentance. They, too, were so rattled by John’s “rude” preaching that they felt a massive urgency to change. They asked John the same question that the GP did, “What do we do?” (Lk. 7:12)

The soldiers present to hear John’s preaching were tactless thugs who joyfully enforced Roman rule with whips and swords, also realized that they were eternally doomed and asked John, “What are we to do, as well” (Lk. 7:14)? Again, and pardon my redundancy, the message that ultimately saved them initially terrified them. Yes, fair reader, the message was, Turn or Burn. And guess what Christian Marketing Experts: that message worked and it is what the Bible calls, “Preparing the way for the Lord … making His paths straight”. John was being cruel to be kind, as Nick Lowe would say, and that’s exactly what The Doctor ordered.

By the way, who says “What do I do” anymore after a sermon? How many peeps do you know who are so stunned by blunt preaching that they earnestly ask after the sermon, “What should I do?” The folks in earshot of John’s call to repentance felt something had to be done. Something had to be remedied immediately. Nowadays, it’s more like, “What’s God going to do for me?” In addition, in our culture, there is very little massive life change. People who supposedly said, “Yes, to Jesus,” manifest zero fruit in keeping with their so-called repentance.

I predict that if the Church in America is going to experience a revival, a reformation, a renaissance (whatever you wanna call it) it’ll first experience a Rude Awakening. The reason is that the American Church, like the world, has a massive entitlement mentality, a Laodicean fascination with stuff, a cowardice before evil politicians and their satanic policies, an aversion to godly duty, an addiction to avarice, and a laissez-faire attitude regarding the Great Commandment and the Great Commission. In addition to that slop, the Church also sports in spades an allergic reaction to any preaching that steps on their well-pedicured toes. Which means, my beloved, some Christians’ toes are going to get walked on. Remember, the “Rude Awakening” brought to you by John always precedes the “Great Awakening” brought to you by Jesus. True revival can be brutal, especially for the fragile snowflakes who are used to being handled with kid gloves.

A year-and-a-half ago, my friend had an altercation with his wife. She broke several of his ribs, cracked his sternum, and gave him a concussion when she yanked him off the couch, while screaming in his face. To this day, his sternum is still in pain because of her blows. The upshot of her injuries to him was that she was performing CPR on him after he suffered a massive heart attack, and she helped save his life. And that, my friends, is pretty much what prophets, like John the Baptist, do: they hurt you to heal you. Or as Hosea put it seven-hundred years before Jesus’ birth …

Come on, let’s go back to God. He hurt us, but he’ll heal us. He hit us hard, but he’ll put us right again. In a couple of days we’ll feel better. By the third day he’ll have made us brand-new, Alive and on our feet, fit to face him. We’re ready to study God, eager for God-knowledge. As sure as dawn breaks, so sure is his daily arrival. He comes as rain comes, as spring rain refreshing the ground. – Hos. 6:1-3 (MSG)

Read that again. Like, real slow.

Alright, let's break it down, shall we?

Before being made, “brand new”. Before a time of “refreshing” comes to our lives “as spring rain refreshing the ground”, Hosea says these things occurred.

1. God’s wayward people turned back to Him. “Come on, let’s go back to God.” Check it out, por favor: No revival without returning back to the Lord. Duh.
2. Hosea said God hurt them before He healed them. “He hurt us, but he’ll heal us. He hit us hard, but he’ll put us right again.” I’ll bet you a $1,000 that scripture is not on a refrigerator magnet for sale via Christian websites. Getting “hurt” and “hit hard” by God sounds like a rude awakening to me. What about you?
3. This hurting by God is what caused His beloved to “feel better”, “(be) made brand new”, “alive and on our feet”, “fit to face Him”, “ready to study God”, “eager for God-knowledge.” Ready to be refreshed, in life by Him, like the spring rain.

I’ve experienced multiple “Rude Awakenings” in my life. Prior to my conversion, me, my girlfriend, and our posse, were enjoying a Sammy Hagar concert in Lubbock, Texas. I believe the year was 1981. I don’t really know. That part of my life is all a blur.

Anyway, Sammy was plowing through his epic song list and we were headbanging along with him while smoking Snoop Dogg-sized amounts of weed, as we plied our livers with a metric-ton of booze. At that juncture, I was nineteen, extremely cocky, with a pretty girlfriend, and a wicked 4-speed Z28. In addition to that, I had a legendary mullet, which I finished off with a red Flashdance headband, and of course, my t-shirt was of the sleeveless variety. Yes, my beloved … I was Beavis. Please note: I was not pondering the afterlife. I was not searching for my destiny or purpose. I was not on a spiritual quest. I wasn’t seeking Jesus. As a matter of fact, Christianity was nowhere near my “To Do List.” My life was all about sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll, 24/7/365, and I never planned on pumping the brakes on that accident waiting to happen. So, I’m at the concert, and Sammy goes into a song from his album, Street Machine. The song is titled, Planet’s On Fire. I had heard that song many times before, but that night … “I heard it” … “heard it”, if you know what I mean. My eyes, ears, soul, and spirit were awakened and sober to its message, and it was not good news for me. Here’s the lyrics …

Planet’s On Fire

Canceled flights, limousines,

Hustle bustles, crazy scenes.

First, you're here, then, you're there

Pretty soon, man, you've been everywhere.

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

We've seen the rise, we'll see the fall

He's here to see us all,

Burn in hell.

Time ticks away, faster, faster.

You run so fast you forget what you're after.

You make a deal to sell your soul

Just to find out, baby, it's been sold.

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

We've seen the rise, we'll see the fall

He's here to see us all,

Burn in hell.

Burn in hell.

Not me, baby!

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

We've seen the rise, we'll see the fall

He's here to see us all,

Burn in hell.

Fine, white lines of crystal light

Keep us up all day and all night.

Oh, we just forgot girls and boys

Who thrive on cosmic toys.

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

We've seen the rise, we'll see the fall

He's here to see us all,

Burn in hell.

Burn in hell, Ow!

(This planet's on fire)

(This planet's on fire)

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire, yeah!

Yes!

To recap: I, Doug Giles, Idiot Emeritus, was a drug-addled moron with zero intentions to desist from that godless glidepath, heard in my spirit something I had never heard before, even though I heard and sang that song many times. It was this …

“Ooh, this planet's on fire

Oh, Satan's desire

We've seen the rise, we'll see the fall

He's here to see us all,

Burn in hell.”

Right then and there, the Holy Spirit hit me with conviction. It was not gentle and sweet. It was not a nudge or a suggestion. It was a short and succinct message of … you’re going to hell if you don’t change. It was clear as crystal and applied to me directly in no uncertain way. Satan was here to see me burn in hell. This was no longer a cool, jammin’, abstract song. It was personal, and God used a rock-n-roll tune to tune me up to the fact that I was under the wrath of God and things were only going to get eternally worse if I didn't repent. It was a rude awakening. I’d like to say that I got saved then and there, but it took another two years of me fighting with God before He conquered me and dragged me into His fold, which was a Great Awakening for this rebel without a clue. God’s mercy, love, forgiveness, and grace are a GREAT thing to those who are condemned and damned, veritable prisoners of the flesh and devils, who’re without hope and estranged from God’s covenant.

Since my conversion back in 1983, I’ve been hit with a few more “rude awakenings” that were not very pleasant at all. Most of them were of my own making. Y’know, God’s heavenly chastisement for my earthly stupidity. Other rude awakenings came through satanic attacks, via his fleshly followers, who love to make Christians’ lives miserable. I won’t bore you with the details, but I will end with this: No matter how painful, brutal, or rude the crapola is you’re currently sloggin’ through, you must understand that pain is a pathway to healing, according to the word of God. God doesn’t mind if a person, church, or nation gets hammered or rebuked because He knows that there’s a great awakening on the tail end of that rude awakening for those who “have ears to hear.” Ergo, my beloved, embrace the rude, the raw and the real even if it bites your flesh and makes you squirm. Our good God has some great things in store for His Church, but to get us where He needs us, sometimes, oftentimes, He must shake and bake us before He shapes and remakes us for His glory. Or as the psalmist put it …

Clash Ministries is here to do two things, namely, put brains and cojones on Christians. Yep, our holy job is renewing minds (Rom.12:1-2) and emboldening hearts (Prov.28:1). Your generosity helps us throttle the enemy by equipping God's people to live bold, wild and free in Him. You are a vital part of this ministry and we could not do this without you. Thank you for your faithful gifts and partnership and remember to always ... stay rowdy!

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Doug Giles is Pastor of Liberty Fellowship in Wimberley, TX, and is the founder of ClashDaily.com​

Follow Doug on Instagram and Twitter @TheArtOfDoug.